Grieving
by fantasy77
Summary: This takes place just at the end of Jason's funeral. It's from Peter's pov. It's him trying to find understanding and acceptance.


**Disclaimer: I don't own Bare, or the characters etc… the only thing I own is my story idea.**

Peter stood at the back of the church as the casket lid was shut for the final time. He felt awkward and lost. Awkward because he knew he wasn't welcomed there but lost because he had lost someone that was important in his life.

The final hymn started up and the Priest from St Cecilia stood and made the closing prayer. All heads were bowed, all but one, Peter's. His face was dry as he looked at the coffin.

Soon all heads were lifted and were all looking at Peter. Some sad, some understanding, some compassionate and some accusing. The only ones that Peter noticed were the accusing ones. He visibly shrank back from them.

People were moving from their pews as the service was over. Peter knew he didn't want to talk anyone so turning on his heel he left the chapel at a quick pace.

Rain was falling lightly to the ground. The gravel crunched under his black dress shoes as he hurried down the drive. Stepping of the drive he walked through the cemetery, leaving the noise of people behind.

Try as he might, Peter couldn't get the image of Jason out of his head. Remembering the look on his face as he had fallen to the floor, Peter crumpled to the ground as his shoulders shook with the sobs he had been suppressing since he had gone. Tears fell down his cheeks; he didn't bother to wipe them because he felt it was his fault that Jason was gone. _His fault…_

Suddenly he felt warmth on his shoulder, a hand gently squeezing his. Stumbling to his feet he pushed the person away. Looking at the person, it was Nadia.

"Hey," she greeted softly. She tried to smile but failed.

"What do you want?" Peter snapped. He sighed; "I'm sorry, it's just…" he looked at her helplessly.

"I know…"

Nadia sat on a tombstone and patted the spot beside her. Peter hesitated then sat down gingerly.

"I miss him. He was always there. I wasn't the only one to deal with our parents. He could cheer up when dad would forget about me. I wish he was here," Nadia sighed softly.

Peter looked at her. He didn't know what to say to her.

Nadia looked at him and gave him a small smile. "It's ok."

"No!" Peter said sharply. "It's not ok. You lost your brother and it's my fault. I should have been more understanding and I should've listened, instead of walking away," his voice faded away.

"Peter, look at me."

Peter slowly met Nadia's gaze.

"I don't blame you, not at all. Everyone makes there own choices in life. No matter how much you can persuade someone, they still have that final say." Nadia put a hand on his forearm. "He made his choices. I just wished I'd known what was going on sooner but you can't change the past," Nadia shrugged.

Peter sighed and nodded. "I know what you are saying but it's just so hard."

"I know but that's why we need each other, to have someone lean on."

"No one would want to lean on me. After what's happened I'm surprised you're here talking to me. Everyone thinks I'm queer and different. Why would someone want to lean on me?" Peter looked down at his laces.

"Because we need you, I need you. It's hard talking to my parents and Ivy is going through a lot what with being pregnant and everything. You know-knew Jason and I know you don't want to be alone because I don't want to go through this alone," she looked at him, her eyes desperate. "Please?"

Peter looked at her silently, and then slowly he put his arms around her and held her in an embrace, just holding her as they both comforted one another.

"Nadia!" a voice yelled out in the distance.

Gently pulling away, Nadia wiped the tears from her face. "Will you lean on me as I lean on you?"

"You won't be alone."

Peter stood up from the tombstone. Nadia did as well.

She touched his sleeve. "And neither will you. I'll see you soon." She gave him a quick hug and a kiss on the cheek.

Peter watched her leave and felt that something was lighter inside him. He may still be sad but he had hope, hope for a new day.

The leaves swirled around him and Peter could have sworn he felt Jason squeeze him gently, almost as if prodding him to move on. He smiled as he walked away feeling that in time things would be ok.

**A/N: This is my first Bare fic. I've seen the musical many times as I was doing the flute part for it. Although the musical has a sad ending it really touched me and I hope I have somehow captured that. Please feel free to leave comments,**

**Thanks,**

**Fantasy**


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